|And on the other side of the coin...
||[Sep. 6th, 2004|11:00 pm]
|||||Fuel - Sunburn (Yes, I really *am* listening to this song)||]|
Completely contradictory to my earlier "Moon-Loving-Barefoot-Hippie" personality...we have the apparently unreasonable and totally illogical psychotic woman.
It has been implied that I am insane because I am not comfortable with my kids coming home from my mother's house with sunburns. She forgot the sunscreen when she took them to the pool. A pool that is 1 minute away from her house. Less than a mile. In the same neighborhood.
I'm sorry, this, to me, is unacceptable. No, I am not sorry. It *should* be unacceptable.
I suggested that they not go over there to visit if the basics can't be attended to. They insinuated I was crazy.
Let me be perfectly clear. I live my life on *my* terms these days. I don't owe anyone anything. I am kind and caring and loving. This does NOT mean I will be a doormat. Nor does it mean that I will allow my children to go where I don't feel they are being properly cared for.
We don't live with them. We don't ask them for anything. It really chaps my ass that my mother feels the need to point out how "helpful" she is because they spent the night at her house. They didn't spend the night there because I didn't want them here. They spent the night there because they wanted to spend time with their grandparents. Novel though, that. Kids wanting to spend time with their family. Go figure.
What chaps my ass even more? That my father said I was being silly. My mom, yeah. I don't expect her to understand. My father, though???? I hate fighting with him. However, I'm not backing down. Those are my kids. It is my responsibility to make sure they are well taken care of. I know that at home, they are. Why should I expect less when they go to their grandparents house?
Perhaps I'd understand his view if this had been *one* time. This has happened every single time she's taken them to the pool. This is the same lady who put baby oil on me and sat me to cook in the sun at age 2 so that I would look more olive complected and look more like her biological child. *snort*
Mind you, I didn't call them screaming. I was calm. I just stated that I thought maybe they ought not come spend large amounts of time over there if it was going to result in sunburns and heartbroken little boys.
That's the other thing. My mom won't let them bring anything home with them. Things I bought them. She says "They won't have it next time they come over". Oh, I assure you. They will remind me if they are forgetting Buzz Lightyear, Barbie, A Special Pillow or any number of things that they think they can't live without for the night. Why fight with them about it???
My kids aren't spoiled. They can go to Toys R' Us and never once throw a wailing shit-fit about me not buying them something. They also know what they need to spend the night somewhere. It's rediculous to not let them have their things. If we were still living 700 miles away, I could understand. As it stands, we live 5 minutes away. If they forget something...I can drop it by. Not a big deal.
MY terms people. MY life. MY kids. MY bills. MY home. MY TERMS.
This year, for Christmas, we are staying here. Mom was so not thrilled to hear that. I'm sorry. We have 4 small children in the house and are likely adding a 5th over the holiday. You can come see them. You can come eat with us. We aren't going somewhere that it's immoral to drop a piece of wrapping paper on the floor. You want to see us? Come here.
I am so very fucking over the bullshit, folks. Me, Myself and I have to make our way in this world and damnit, we are.